Pursuing Marriage – What A Relationship Should Look Like

Pursuing Marriage – What A Relationship Should Look Like

If the parents approve of a relationship, what should it look like?

Meats for the belly, and the belly for meats: but God shall destroy both it and them. Now the body is not for fornication, but for the Lord; and the Lord for the body. And God hath both raised up the Lord, and will also raise up us by his own power. Know ye not that your bodies are the members of Christ? shall I then take the members of Christ, and make them the members of an harlot? God forbid. What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he, shall be one flesh. But he that is joined unto the Lord is one spirit. Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s. Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.1 Corinthians 6:13-7:2

The purpose of all of life is to glorify God. When it comes to relationships, they are to glorify God. The only way a romantic relationship can glorify God is within the confines of marriage. As such, the only reason that a young couple should be interacting in any romantic sense is for the purpose of marriage. Casual dating is not glorifying to God. A couple should either be pursuing marriage or their romantic relationship should end.

But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried careth for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord: But he that is married careth for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife. There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.1 Corinthians 7:32-34

His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry. But he said unto them, All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given. For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother’s womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.Matthew 19:10-12

A Christian should be concerned only with the Kingdom of God. Dating and courting can be major distractions from the Kingdom. A Christian may pursue marriage for the sake of the Kingdom, but the end of that pursuit is going to either be a marriage that glorifies God or a quick end to a relationship that does not bring about that end. All romantic relationships should be pursued with deliberate intention. We cannot allow romantic relationships to be a distraction from the Kingdom.

Now the birth of Jesus Christ was on this wise: When as his mother Mary was espoused to Joseph, before they came together, she was found with child of the Holy Ghost. Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not willing to make her a publick example, was minded to put her away privily. But while he thought on these things, behold, the angel of the Lord appeared unto him in a dream, saying, Joseph, thou son of David, fear not to take unto thee Mary thy wife: for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Ghost. And she shall bring forth a son, and thou shalt call his name JESUS: for he shall save his people from their sins. Now all this was done, that it might be fulfilled which was spoken of the Lord by the prophet, saying, Behold, a virgin shall be with child, and shall bring forth a son, and they shall call his name Emmanuel, which being interpreted is, God with us. Then Joseph being raised from sleep did as the angel of the Lord had bidden him, and took unto him his wife: And knew her not till she had brought forth her firstborn son: and he called his name JESUS.Matthew 1:18-25

In my Father’s house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also.John 14:2-3

Prepare thy work without, and make it fit for thyself in the field; and afterwards build thine house.Proverbs 24:27

When a man hath taken a new wife, he shall not go out to war, neither shall he be charged with any business: but he shall be free at home one year, and shall cheer up his wife which he hath taken.Deuteronomy 24:5

The romantic relationship should either end amicably or in engagement/betrothal. Once betrothed, the couple should finalize finances, housing, etc. and then get married. The couple should only get married when they are able to firmly establish a new family. For most young people, this means that they should delay pursuing a romantic relationship until they can reasonably quickly finalize finances and housing.

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