The man is the head
The man is not supposed to be the leader in his home; he is the leader in his home. He is either leading poorly or leading well. When a man complains that his wife will not “let him” lead he is in fact still leading; he is just leading poorly. Although women are sinners, most of the time when a woman will not follow her husband’s leadership it is evidence of poor leadership.
A woman needs to feel loved
It is not enough for a woman to be told that she is loved; she must actually feel loved. This is the number one complaint from women in marriage counseling; they do not feel loved and valued by their husbands. Jesus sets the example for husbands in how to love our wives; we must make huge sacrifices to demonstrate to our wives our love for them. Remember, a woman who does not feel valued will have a hard time following the leadership of a man that she believes doesn’t love her.
The meaning of husband
The word husband does refer to the man within a marriage, but it also refers to a gardener or caretaker of animals. The job of a husband is to make his wife flourish and grow. This is what Jesus does with His bride. A run down woman is evidence of a horrible husband. Just as you do not blame a garden for being overgrown with weeds, you do not blame a woman who is run down and abused. The fault lies with the husband; he has not nourished, cherished, and cared for his wife. You can tell the character of a husband by his wife’s countenance.
One of the primary jobs of a husband is to ensure that his wife is growing in conformity to Jesus. He cannot change her; only God can do that. A husband’s job is to arrange the meeting. He must lead the family in devotions, church attendance, worship, etc.
Be considerate and respectful
If you were to ask women what they were looking for in a man, almost all of them would put “a good listener” at the top of the list. Wives want to know that they are heard and that their thoughts, feelings, and ideas are being taken into consideration by their husbands. A man needs to know his wife’s feelings and thoughts, and he needs to be respectful of his wife in public and private. As he leads, he needs to take his wife’s thoughts and feelings into consideration.
Joint heirs of God’s grace
Although men and women are created vastly different, they have equal standing before God. The quickest way for a man to experience the wrath of God is for him to mistreat his wife. If you mess with God’s daughter He will not listen to your prayers. You must treat your wife the way that Jesus treats you. You must treat your wife as a co-inheritor of God’s grace.
Will you love your wife as Christ loved the church? Will you encourage the men in your life who are being good husbands? Do you know the love of Jesus Christ for you?